Summer Heights High » Quotes » Ja'mie

Episode 1 | Episode 2 | Episode 3 | Episode 4 | Episode 5 | Episode 6 | Episode 7 |

Episode One

“At Hillford, girls like me are offered a world of opportunity. Sport, drama, music and more music, and of course, academia. It’s a well-rounded education, in an amazing environment.”

“Oh my god. Hi! I’m Ja’mie. It’s so cool to be here.”

“Oh my god, so you’re going to Hillford? That’s really cool. You’ll fit in, there’s so many Asians there.”

"Get back in the car, you're not coming in."

“It’s so kind of like not shady. Do you know what I mean? Like there’s not that many trees.”

“Like I think when they were choosing people, like they wanted someone who was good at pretty much everything. And like, because it’s gonna be on the news and on TV and stuff, like - I don’t wanna brag - but I think they wanted someone decent looking.”

“It’s way less… like, not crap, but less povo than I thought it would be.”

“I love your bins, they’re so random.”

“And teachers at my school are always going, ‘Ja’mie, oh my god, you’re the most likely to succeed’ and stuff, ‘cause I’m like the smartest non-Asian in year 11. And I’m good at sport and everything that Asians can’t do, so I’m such a good ambassador for the school.”

“The buildings are so, kind of grey, no offence.”

“Public schools are so random.”

“My name is Ja’mie. JA apostrophe MIE. Weird name, I know, but you’ll get used to it.”

“Yes I come from one of the most expensive private girls schools in the state, but I’m actually really cool. Please don’t be intimidated by me.”

“People always go, ‘private schools create better citizens’, but I would say they create better quality citizens. Studies have shown that students from private schools are more likely to get into uni and end up making a lot more money, while wife-beaters and rapists are nearly all public school educated. Sorry, no offence, but it’s true.”

“Some of you come from povo families, but that’s not your fault. Some of you I know don’t even have Foxtel.”

“My friends think I'm an idiot. They're like, 'why would you go to Summer Heights High? It's like the boganest school in the world!' It’s such a random thing for me to do, but I’m always doing things that like push outside the boundaries. D’you know what I mean?"

“That’s me being an idiot. My friends say that I look like Mischa Barton in that photo. I so don’t.”

“I usually try to avoid public school people, d’you know what I mean? Like, one time I went to this year 10 formal with this guy from a public school as a joke, like me and my friends thought it would be so cool to just check out all the bogans and stuff. D’you know what I mean? And it was such a crap formal.”

“Oh my god, that’s some of my modelling portfolio shots. They should not be in there. That’s really embarrassing.”

“I think it’s a dumb thing. Like I think a lot of public school people are dumb. And I think that, it’s not really their fault, that’s the thing. It comes from their parents.”

Episode Two

“I’m really nervous this morning, ‘cause it’s my actual first day. And so, like last night I couldn’t sleep, and I woke up this morning and I forgot to feed the guinea pig.”

“I got here and Mr Cameron showed me around. He’s so hot for a teacher.”

“They set me up with this girl called Ashley, and she’s supposed to like take me to classes and introduce me to her friends and stuff. And seriously, like I don’t wanna be a bitch, but she’s like the fugliest girl I’ve ever met in my life.”

“The lockers here are so cute! So small. So is there much theft around here? ‘Cause it’s a public school.”

“Oh my god, the guys are so hot. They’re so multicultural.”

“Oh you’ve got wheelchair people, that’s so cute! Oh my god I love disabled people. We don’t have them at our school. We’ve got like one burns victim, but we don’t have any mentally retarded people.”

“My breasts would have been bigger but I had an eating disorder in year 8 so they didn’t develop properly.”

“I don’t wanna be a bitch but you guys are really boring.”

“It’s so like sunny here, it’s like there’s no shade or anything.”

“Are they mean to you? Can you introduce me to them?”

“I was walking ‘round the playground going, ‘Are there any decent-looking girls here?’”

“And in my group at school I’m like the hottest girl, so I attract all the guys and that.”

“I try to avoid other cultures at all costs.”

“Oh my god, we’re friends.”

“Do you have lesbians at this school? Oh my god. I don’t think you’re allowed to be a lesbian at my school.”

“Just because I’m rich doesn’t mean I’m a bitch.”

“There are so many fat chicks at this school.”

“I thought public school girls would be all like, like skanky bogans and like totally dumb and stuff. They’re so not.”

“I read an article about all the sluts in public schools. It’s so bad.”

“There ARE more sluts in public schools, no offence.”

“In a private school area, in a rich school area – shut up, let me explain – in a rich area, hot people breed with other hot people and have hotter kids.”

“I don't wanna be in classrooms where there’s like, no air conditioning and like asbestos in the roof and stuff, and just crap desks and skanky bogans everywhere, and sluts...”

“When I meet girls they’re usually really threatened straight away, right. So that I meet them and then they’re like, ‘oh my god, she’s so hot. I’m never gonna be friends with her.’ And then I go up to them and I’m like, ‘hi! How you going?’ And they’re really surprised that I’m giving them the time of day.”

“She makes the dumbest calls and she’s just like so random. It’s not ‘cause she’s Asian, it’s ‘cause she’s annoying.”

Episode Three

“What would you choose, giant tits or fat with no tits? Giant tits. Yeah what am I thinking?”

“No offence, but I seriously hate all fat people.”

“Where I live, there’s this like first year uni student who went out with a year 6 girl. I’m just joking, only joking. I was just seeing if you’d believe me.”

“This is gonna sound really random, but I reckon some of the year seven’s are actually hot at this school.”

“They’re hot, like you can tell they’re gonna be hot when they get older.”

“Can I have a go? I know it’s really random, but can I have a go?”

“So are there like year 7 parties and stuff? Would you ever invite older girls to them?”

“Year 7’s such a random year.”

“I love peace. Are you into peace? I would never go out with a guy that wasn’t into peace.”

“I love your personality Sebastian, you’re just so out there.”

“Ties are so random, don’t you reckon? What are they, they’re like just fabric? So weird.”

“So, do you have any fat people in your family? ‘Cause you know how like you get skinny kids and they end up being really fat when they’re older?”

“Did you think I was hot, when you saw me in the playground and stuff? It was pretty obvious from the way you were acting.”

“We’ll take it slow at first, like I don’t wanna get hurt or anything.”

“Hot! Look at that, full body!”

“I’m so into him. Like it’s not like deep love, but it’s definitely love.”

“Yep, I reckon he’s the one.”

“Who the fuck is she?”

“Friends do not write two text messages in an hour, saying, ‘See you in English.’ ‘Save me a seat.’”

“Why would you do this to me? Look at me. I’m fucking hot. You could’ve had everything. You could’ve had all of this. You’re just gonna throw it away.”

“I fucking hate you forever. You’re a fucking arsehole and thanks for breaking my heart, you fuckwit!”

“I dumped him!”

“He cheated on me. He’s made me feel less hot!”

“Am I hot? Am I hot?”

Episode Four

“Guys, just learn what a sense of humour is, okay? It is a joke.”

“Guys, seriously, build a bridge and get over it.”

“All my friends have totally lost it, and they’ve gone around the school telling everyone that I’m a bitch and not to be friends with me. But I don’t even care, ‘cause like I make friends really easily and I don’t need them.”

“Why would I wanna be friends with you anyway, you lesbian curly-haired bitch?”

“I’m not sitting next to some random emo!”

“Why don’t you go fuck yourself? Public school bitch.”

“You know what would be embarrassing? Having your head.”

[crying] “Mum it’s me. I’m, really upset. You’ve gotta come pick me up. ‘Cause everyone’s being a bitch to me.”

[crying] “I should never have come here. They don’t even have fucking grass on their oval, it’s all just dirt.”

[crying] “I am not gonna see the school counsellor, you bitch!”

“I will have no hesitation in smashing your dolls cupboard with a hammer, Mum. I’m serious.”

“Or maybe I’ll get pregnant. Maybe I’ll just go and root some teacher or something, and get pregnant, and then you deal with that. You’ll have to fucking raise the baby. Is that what you want?”

“I am seriously going to like hyperventilate and die and it will be your fault!”

“I am not fucking getting the train home! The train stations out in the suburbs here are seriously fucked up. I’m gonna get like raped or something, and then I’ll be like in counselling for the rest of my life and it will be your fault!”

“Why are you the biggest bitch in the world to me? I’m 16, Mum. In a couple of years time I’m gonna be out of your life. I’m not even gonna fucking invite you to my wedding.”

“She walks around going, ‘I’m Asian. Oh I’m so cool. I’ve got a little cute Asian accent. Ooh, look at my fringe! Asian, Asian!’”

“Oh good, she just swore. Really nice. Did you hear that? She called me a fucking cow. Fucking mental bitch.”

“You’re the biggest slut in the whole school… ‘Cause everyone talks about it behind your back.”

“Shut your face and go to a hairdresser and sort your fucking roots out.”

“You are so fat the fat has nowhere to go and it pops out your chest.”

“If you give me that look again Bec, I am gonna like slap you down, bitch. Seriously Bec, Quantas is doing some good deals on one-way tickets to China. Why don’t you buy one?”

“I can’t breathe. I can’t breathe, guys, I can’t breathe!”

“Action! Hi guys, did you get the picture? Oh my god, how funny was it? I can’t believe I accidentally sent it to you. And you and the mental illness thing, so funny. I’m so glad you thought it was funny. Oh my god! Cut.”

“And I learnt that you’ve gotta be really careful when you wanna bitch about your friends.”

Episode Five

“It’s been an amazing week. I’ve set up a Student Representative Council – an SCR – and all my friends are in it, and Ashley ‘cause she begged to be in it. And we’re doing what we can to make some really cool changes around the school.”

“The mirrors in the girls’ toilets are really crap and dirty. They’re so small, so we really wanna get big ones, like really massive ones, like full length so you can see footwear.”

“We wanna get a girls only year 11 common room, where there’s like lap tops and stuff for everyone, just chill out, so there’s like wireless Internet and like, so we can just chat on MSN at lunchtimes to each other.”

“One of the things we’re doing – and I’m so excited about it – is we’re doing a year 11 formal!”

“I just wanna show these guys how to have a good time. Like just ‘cause you go to a public school doesn’t mean you can’t go off, d’you know what I mean?”

“Shut up guys I just thought of an idea. Oh my god, we could do like a hunger strike. Like just don’t eat. Don’t eat and say, ‘We’ll keep not eating until you let us have the formal.’ Seriously. We can get the whole of year 11 involved!”

“We’ve been here for like 10 minutes. You told me you were anorexic, obviously you were lying.”

“Deal with it! We’re starving for a cause.”

“The protest on the oval didn’t really work, so I’ve come up with a new plan. I’m gonna go and see Mr Cameron and I’m gonna tell him that I’ve started cutting my arms and like that’s why I’m wearing the jumper. So I’m just gonna go in and go, ‘Oh my god, what do you want me do to? Like, I’m gonna kill myself if you don’t let us have it.’ Seriously, and if he doesn’t let us have it then he’s a bastard and it’s like murder, he should go to jail or something ‘cause I could die from cutting myself.”

“Sir I’m just seriously upset and I can’t believe I’m doing this to myself, but you said we couldn’t have it and it was just humiliating for me. And I think I’m gonna keep doing this until you let us have the formal.”

“A school that bans formals is a school that bans life. Summer Heights High, you should be ashamed of yourself. Firstly, formals can give hope. They give povvo people something to live for. Lack of formals in a school can also seriously affect the development of a girl. Without formals you can seriously stunt girls socially and physically.”

Episode Six

“Oh my god guys; issue. I had a girl come up to me in the playground, asking me wether she can go to the formal with another girl. And not as a joke thing, like as in full on lesbians. I just don’t think we should be letting them come”

“I don’t wanna be like, upstaged by a bunch of dykes.”

“If you can guarantee me it’s a cool thing, and it’s gonna make us look good, then I think we should do it. Ashley, can you write that down? All lesbians allowed to the formal.”

“Hi I’m Ja’mie, you probably know that. We just wanted to let you know that the formal committee’s decided that lesbians can come to the formal, so um, come along, get some ticket’s – they’re 450 bucks – and we’ll see you on the night. Thanks.”

“That went really well. I’m so glad it was quick. I always think she’s trying to like crack onto me.”

“It’s such a good look going with a disabled guy. You get heaps of cred for like being sympathetic and stuff.”

“I want it to be an amazing night, and I want my partner to be amazing.”

“I’ve been really confused for a while, but now I know for sure, and I’m really into chicks.”

“I want us to look equally hot on the night, so if that’s what you’re worried about, then don’t, ‘cause we, like I can give you some tips.”

“Year 11 formal tickets! Year 11 formal tickets! 450 bucks. Have you got the money on you today?”

“I’m cool, I’m okay about it. I’ve always known. I was just born this way.”

“I told her I was a lesbian so she’d say yes to take me to the formal. She thinks I am one.”

“She is like the second hottest girl in year eleven. The combination of her and I is gonna be awesome. Seriously.”

“We should do awards at the formal and have like the hottest lesbian couple. And me and Tamsin can win it!”

Episode Seven

“When I said I was gonna plan a formal, I didn’t realise you guys would be too povo to pay for it, no offence.”

“Oh my god, I just thought of an idea! We could do like, a fundraiser! Yeah, I’ve done heaps of them, I know what to do!”

“I’ve done heaps of this kinda stuff before, and the key thing is to make people feel really guilty.”

“Going with the AIDS thing means people are more likely to give money, ’cause they’re gonna feel really bad. Like if I just said it was for the formal, they wouldn’t care.”

“The dress-up theme is AIDS, so come dressed as an aids-related thing, like a doctor, a nurse, a patient or an African.”

“Well I don’t really see it as lying. It’s like, just delaying telling them the truth about it.”

“Oh you came as a lesbian, that looks cool! Kinda relates – gay, AIDS.”

“Mr Cameron can I check your heart rate? Only joking.”

“This is the Dolce & Gabbana dress that I wore to my year 9 formal. As you can see, it still fits me.”